| People often assume that if you’re friendly, approachable, and good with people, you must be endlessly social. The truth is more nuanced. I work hard at being social. My job asks it of me, and I willingly give it. I enjoy people, conversation, and connection. I like showing up well. But at the end of the day, I still need to power down. I don’t mind spending time with my partner’s family. I’m happy to be there, to take part, to show up. But after a full day of being outward-facing, what I often need most is quiet space to decompress, huddle, and reset. And this is where honesty matters. I don’t live in labels, and I don’t allow a diagnosis to define who I am. But the reality is that I am on the spectrum. I’m socially capable, warm, and friendly — and I’ve learned those skills well. What people don’t always see is that being too social drains me faster than it might drain others. That doesn’t cancel out the connection. It just changes the recovery time. There are moments when the social side of life — the listening, the engaging, the being present — is just as tiring as physical work. Not because it’s negative, but because it requires energy, focus, and intention. So if I’m quieter sometimes, or choose stillness over conversation, it’s not withdrawal. It’s maintenance. Being social doesn’t mean being limitless. And needing to reboot doesn’t make you difficult — it makes you self-aware. |
Being Social Isn’t the Same as Being Limitless
Earthly Comforts 